The First Letter to my Son

I remember being in high school and having notebooks full of poetry. One of the poems I wrote was titled “To my Son,” and for the life of me, I can’t remember what it said. The point is, I think I’ve always known I was going to have a son. I think there are a lot of things I feel like I am supposed to teach you and make up for some of the things I missed out on growing up. I know we will have a lot of time to talk about anything and everything as you grow up, but there are a few things I want you to know before you arrive.

You have a lot to live up to. Your mother is an amazing person who will love you more than you will ever understand. Her love will test you, but that is something that will only make you the best version of yourself. She will expect great things from you, as will I, and she will teach you how to get the most out of yourself. She is many other things that I’m sure will come up later, but for now, just know that you have to be nice to her because she loves you more than anyone in the world.

Selfishly, I want you to be a lot like me. I want you to like the things that I like, and think the way that I think (your mother would probably disagree, but you’ll find that to be the case sometimes). I am probably going to try to teach you things that you already know, or don’t think are very important. But if there are three things I can convince you are important so that you can be the best version of yourself that you can be, it is to be confident, considerate, and reliable.

Be confident with girls, sports, school, business, friendships, and hobbies. Do not let doubt or fear keep you from trying new things and allow yourself to fail if it means that you will try again. Confidence will take you places that you want to go, and will open doors that might not otherwise be open.

But also be considerate. Always consider the angles, whether that is someone else’s feelings, or another way to solve a problem. Being considerate means thinking through things and determining the best way to do something. Consider others when you can and make someone else smile.

Finally, be reliable. Be reliable to yourself and to others, especially your family and friends. When you say you will do something, make sure you do it. Being reliable also means being honest, which is something that is earned, not given. It’s a powerful thing when you can say something and see it through; when someone can ask you something and have confidence that if you say you will, then you will.

The last, and most important, thing you have to do in life is to do whatever it is that makes you happy (it’s our unofficial family motto). Do not let anyone else let you think that what makes you happy isn’t important. You will be tested often on this, but if you are true to who you are and don’t let things other people say affect how you think, then you will live a happy life.

Just know that whatever you do in life will make your mother and I proud, and that you will be loved. I can’t wait to meet you and to remind you of all the reasons you are so special.

Three Things to Remember

  • Be nice to your mother, because you will forever be her favorite thing in the world
  • Be confident, considerate, and reliable
  • Do what makes you happy

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